This month, a densely-woven Jon's been struggling to keep his mind out of the gutter by smearing a microphone thinly over the top of a modest vape rig and pushin a pre-1994 Barbie doll into a red cabbage, while serving borscht to a red-headed widow. Mike, though, has officially been busier than him, scribbling a 10-year callback on manuscript at 3am and shouting 'Number!' at other podcasters in a hell of his own making. Nevertheless, he's found time to brush aside Will Smith's slap (despite living under a Rock) and consider this year's Oscar-nominated songs. We hear about Billie Eilish trying not to suck. Van Morrison's car-horn brass and BV shred-concealment. A drone-dodging Reba McEntire losing her precariously balanced hat. And Beyonce leaving her ornamental trombonists unpainted for want of a euphoniumist's chair. In other news, we channel George Massenburg through the Tamagotchi recorder to capture the finest one-dimensional voltage wobbles, and (once we've recovered from our pre-shawm flinch) hear a swanee saxophonist making bubblegum instrumentalists sound like skill minnows. All in all, it's an intense emotional struggle with a fretless foghorn on a slightly elevated sofa.

To hear Jon's latest single 'Lie To Me', head over to

And you can find Mike's super-grammatical tuning video at

Thanks to Benn Jordan and Daniel Vaczi for allowing me to use the glissotar demonstration featured in this episode. Check out Benn's youtube channel at and Daniel's incredible performances with the Glissonic Trio at

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